Bangkok

Day1-3

Travel as 2 person is bit different. 

Late night arrival at Bangkok airport. Cheap metered taxi outside at first level.  Taxi with meter on is decent and safe. 

First day at Bangkok was busy site seeing. People try to scam us all day which start off as annoying. But later because a tourist attraction itself. No we don't want to buy suit in 34 degree weather and today is not public holiday. For novice traveller we made it out alive. Turk Turk driver always charge more than the taxi. Better and cheaper with meter taxi for sure and it has air-con too. Bangkok-bit like shanghai 20 years ago with nicer people. 

We went to china town for lunch after 2 temples. Food was really good. The dim sim taste better than any I had in Australia. We sat next to a gangster looking old woman in her 70s. They also sell shark fin and birds nest. Box of birds nest with 25 in it cost 1000 australian dollars. Every second shop in china town sells gold. Business here is booming. 

After afternoon nap to escape hot temperature. We headed to royal palace. This is mat's first royal palace. I have seem a few different one around the world. The temple in the palace is so shinny and beautiful. Not too crowed for a popular attraction if you come early or late which means no decent tour guide. The palace wall is full of art. The stone dog stand at the door has cheeky smile on it. The building is made from different color glass and gold. Bling bling!!!! 

We had the best pad Thai in Bangkok for dinner (thip samai). Then try to get to boxing stadium (ratchademoen). Turk Turk refuse to take us there. So we walked. Walked right into the blue shirt protested camp (now I know why no one willing to drive us here). They been camping here for 6 months now. Feel bit funny walk through the camp even it's in the middle of the road. Had bad vibe here. Blue shirt is anti- government. They want democracy without voting. We finically arrive at the Thai-boxing. 3 class tickets. 1000/1500/2000 bah. Tourist price. Mat insist we get ring price of 2000 bah. But we end up moved to 1500 bah sit because we had better view. Whole roll of sit just for 2 of us because most Thai in cheap cage area and falon at ring area. Pop corn and beer is served. The fighting start at 6.30 with 8 years old kid who kick shit out of each other. (This is kick boxing after all). The 8 year old fight is most entertaining. They don't hit as hard so they hit more often. Kick and pouch one after another. The Thais behide the tall fence went wild at betting and screaming. Waving their hand and scream: knee knee knee. Second fight is between 14 year olds. Then 16, 18 and so on. Then we had a display fight between a Spanish man and a Thai boxer. All the fights were violent. Often with knock down and harsh kick in the head. I had complex emotion about this. The boys in the ring is like animals. It's like a cock fight. But the chicken are very young boys. On the other hand, I enjoy watching it. 

Day two we decide to relax: shopping and massage later. We end up at famous khon San road. It use to be a place people buy rice. Now it's backpacker road. We decided to drink chang and people watch (2pm). The backpackers come from all around the world because lonely planet said so. I saw my first tower beer. How interesting, we should have on in oz. mat got drunk by 6pm and start buying scorpion to eat. And every old foreign guy walk pass. He would  scream out: sex pest. We end up chatting to people from Sweden, America and German. He called the German nazi.

 The bar man wanted me give tips. He said: no tips. No good. I replied: no good, no care. Service at this bar is really crap. 

6 hours of drinking later. I manage to get my drunken bf back in hostel. Who end up drank with Canadians outside hostel. I go check on him twice. I left him outside and went to bed when their conversation gone to how to pick up blond big boob girls in front of a blond girl... 

Old 2013 blog Santiago chile

Day 3 Santiago. 

Wake up at 10 am and realize I missed free breakfast. In shock how lazy I feel. Then I spend another hour in bed. After 5 dollar lunch which consist toast and coffee. I journey my way towards museo of arte. Because my dark hair and eye color and Chinese people migrate everywhere. I feel like a local here. More local than chinchilla and rockingham in fact. Only if I could speak Spanish! I can fit in!!!  A lady crossed the road from a park with two large dog yarb in Spanish at me when she walk pass me. I had no idea what she was talking about.  I smile and nod at her and keeps going. Outside the museo of arte. There is huge statue of two gay looking men. I wish I could understand what the artist trying to express. They look like they in the middle of bondage sex. The museo cost $1.2 or 600 peso to enter. Cheap! I have 400,000 peso on me. It makes me feel like a millionaire. This a modern art museum. At the entrance I discover who stole my shirt. Music, art and love is so much part of people in Santiago. I took a photo of statue with a girl looking in the eyes of a boy. That level of intimacy is everywhere in the parks of Santiago. Couples express their love and affection in a deepest level at most public spaces. It show a level of connection often don't experience or understand by western couple. Their look in the eye and the way they hug is like saying: I love you. Trust me with your life and deepest fear. I will treasure you and hold you like this is the last days of our lives. Let's become one and let one become us. I deeply admire them. Admire how they spend hours (4-5 hours in fact) on the grass. Kissing, cuddling, talking and laughing. It's rude to take photo of couples in the park. So I took photo of statue instant. 

Next stop is castillo hidalgo. At free entrance, they gave me free post card. So far I had free dinner, free wine, free breakfast, free entrance to park, free city tour and museo. Now free post card! Feeling the love baby....mhahahaha.

Back to Castillo hidalgo.

Don pedro de valdivia decide to come to santiago and build a house and church on top of small hill in the middle of the city in 1600. He decided on the location because it's so steep and hard to climb. Perfect to defend agains the local Indians. The indians has their name for the place. It's translate into 'sadness', so many died here. Pedro got captured and killed in a most horrible death.(eating gold dust. Then his body was cooked.) at the bottom of the castle, there is a man-made waterfall. Sit here long enough, you can hear the voice of death and water turn into a reddish pink. On the top of the hill, on the top of pedro's castle. There is two street dogs in deep sleep as if the the battle never happened. And all the death and restless soul is now in peace. 

Rest of the afternoon. I am going to sit in the park, watch people kissing. Enjoy the sun and read a book call 'all road to austen'. 

Thailand- tonsai love - paradise

It's has been a week in Thailand and yet it feel like a life time. After 3 days in ao nang. I moved to tonsai. Tonsai is so chill out. All the climbers are super nice and friendly. It took me a while to find some friends. Surpricely Americans- again. Americans I have met so far has big heart. Helping the weak is in their nature. Some people come to tonsai just for climbing. But in fact it should always be more. Checked into panyan bowglow. It's shabby. 150 bah alright. Then moved into country side resort. The bowglow is made from wood this time. Deck is good place to do yoga in the morning. Half hour yoga, healthy breakfast made from 4 fruits and yogurt(at mamas. Everyone's favour place for food). Lying around on rest days. Climb every now and then. At chill out bar, locals sing to the wave. Paradise on earth. All those strange character here. Saturday night. A Thai band play spanish music and English. They played all my favour song from all different places I have been to. For there and then. The music was only play for me. Memories came back to me. Memories from my life. I was driving at outback australia. Dancing salsa at bar with friend in Darwin. Love, happiness and suffering. A celebration of past. With my happy cookie. It all seen so unreal. Then fire show. A sign of rebirth. Then band was back. Songs from my new life. From what I can remember from the music. My new life is going to be happy and colorful. A wonderful experience in a far away place. Tonsai, a place of new beginning. My zero of the tarot card. The unancher point of begining where I celectrabte my death and rebirth. 

Direction sign. Direction of my life. Going all directions. Why can't everything just be random? 

Random local singing at beach 

Tonsai

A dream. 

Tonsai part 2

Endless dream have to come to a end. The whole week seem to be a life time. It brings all to a end soon enough. Strange and wonderful people. Lela, Casper, dj and Marco. (Including: stu, Ray, andros, the beautiful French guy and bar men at the sunset) Everyone that I shared part of me with. Tonsai, a place full of strange and wonderful. Love peace and lust. A place no like any other. Food at mamas is wonderful. Chill out bar is super chill out. Freedom bar- a prefect place to sit. Fresh coconut. Endless wonder of shakes. Here I felt like a candle and burn brightly. 

Memories: fire wall, melting wall, tonsai wall, cobra wall, 123 and esta wall. Then lost monkey world. Quat my climbing guide. This is a place where those social unfit become accepted as who they are. Rocks and limestone brought everyone together. There is no border, no wall, no social unjust. No age difference, It's just us. Playing games on the beach. Dance with music mid-night. 

Tonsai- forever for me. 

Death of Chinese hippie town

The whole lijiang and dali thing really disappoint me. 

I was in lijiang 6, 7 years ago. The place was quiet and magical. The locals still live their daily life there. Locals were still washing their vegi in the water from the river. I was in dali 6 years ago. Relaxing hippie everywhere, fresh baked bread and orange juice. Return to those two city saddens me how they turn into another tourist trap. The culture, the vibe.....totally gone. Totally destroyed. I read about police crack down on weed in 2009 from Beijing. Without hippie, dali just another Chinese city. 

Surpricely I found a town inbetween dali and lijiang. Shaxi. The market day was excellent. Everything is cheap. Few old temple and mountain to trek around. I met few interesting character here. Small town hardly any tourist. Bit of lost in time feeling. I will return.

Chasing the dog in lijiang china. Tian tian and Dian dian

Shaxi old theater, trekking in the hill, theater god, me and my travel friend, item from horse tea trail, local wood craft

May 1 year ago ayahuasca

Just finish reading 'yage letter' describe a junky on exile and got lucky with ayahuasca. It's been a year since my experience. Still I remember most of that night. I want to write it down so I can remember and celebrate My experience of death and rebirth

I went to drink the vine of soul without knowing what it will do to me. Me and 2 Russian arrive in a rounded hut. It was made from clay with window on the roof. There were two shaman. The younger one can't speak much English. The older shaman decide he was going to facilitate the night for us the last mins. (Lucky for me!!) the older shaman's name mean-show the path.

The round room had around 8 mattress. Near each mattress is a roll of toilet paper and a plastic bucket. It was a night of full moon and it was chill. We start off with a ceremony. We picked a coca leave each to represent our gift and offering to puchamana. The younger shaman lay down a tradition cloth. He divided the cloth into four section represent four god. The sun, puchamana, the spirit of animal and our ancestor. He chanted and took our coca leave into the wind. 

 

Then older shaman came. He sat in the middle and we picked our bed for the night. He took out a coke bottle fill with brown looking liquid. We got a shot glass each. It tasted like Chinese medicine when I was a kid. In the next 30 mins we had a group talk. I had a question, but really I didn't know what was my real question. I got pretty confused. He told us to lay down. he turn the light off and light a candle for us.

I can feel something is effecting me. I am a strong person and always in charge of myself. Not having control of myself sometimes scares me and that's why I dislike drugs. The shaman came over and said to me: let it go. It's full moon tonight and power is strong.

So I did. Let my mind run wild. Younger shaman started to play instrument. It was beautiful. Color came to me, bright and vivid, like the sun with a mix of orange and green. The color is moving. Such a strange vision which I never experienced before. Then goes the nauseous and vomiting. ' Let it all go.' The old shaman said to me: let all the negative go. I thought: do I really have a choice in this?' 

Few vomiting later. I lay down again. Color came back to me. I start to giggle. I felt happy and cheerful. Then there goes the vomiting again. I heard laughers from the girl next bed. The candle is flicking, casting shadows everywhere. The music plays on. Different type of instrument. I saw color dancing with the music. Flowing slowly. 

 As the time pass, green yellow turned dark. I hold on to my Buddha bee. The bright color came back to me. Then slowly everything turn dark again. Then over time the moving dark color turn into dark snake like. I was scared and hopeless and the darkness is coming for me, and I fear. Must be the dark side of me I thought. I can't move, can't talk or asking for help. I saw naked woman dancing. I wish someone would help. 

Here came the old shaman. He start to sing a song just over my head. He came to my aid. He knew I needed help. His song brought back the color and i start giggle and be happy again. I won't know what to do without him.

Hour may pass. The old shaman came over and told me he has a message for me. He told me that my ancestors want me to burn incense for them. What a strange thing to say I thought. Then I thought of my grandma and my grandpa. I remember where I was when they pass away. Then I start crying Uncontrollably. Mix emotions came to me. My grief - my family - people I love. I thought I lost them all. I thought I was alone. (For over 18 years, life been unhappy and I didn't understand why). 

I didn't know how long I cried until I finish whole roll of paper and asked for another. There is liquid came out of eye, nose and mouth. I laughed while crying told shaman how disgusting it was I lay over my wet hair with stuff coming out of me.

The vision came to me and told me how I can be happy. Wola magic. My Problem solved. That easy after 18 years.

When the crying finally stopped, I felt physically sick from hunger. The pain felt like I was about to die. At least by now I can control my vision. Vision of lots of chocolate cake flew around. I thought: I am sick of this hallucination. I just want sleep. Not long after that I fall asleep. The music played for hours. When I fall asleep, shaman put a few more blanket on me. 

Wake up in the morning, I was hungry and dizzy. Fuck this I thought: I never going to touch and drug in my life. Not even drink beer. I went in shaman's house next door. Shaman offered me a piece of bread. 

I didn't know how it worked. When we grow up. We get damaged as time and event happen to us. Those little damaged takes a bit of our soul with it. Only over one night, I was able somehow reach into the other level of consciousness. Reach out to collect them. Feeling of completeness and connection with the mountain and earth. I can't help smiling for weeks no end. The world isn't the world I knew and I wasn't the me I knew. It's like I learned the secret of the universe. And for a while I was part of the universe. I was in heaven.

Would I ever take it again?

Yes if I need to. For me, dying once in this life time is enough. 

Now that voice in my head can tell me what to do. For now I can say after 33 years. I am finally happy. Now I understand why old shaman is called showing the path. 

Darwin -

Darwin. - my temp home for the last 4 months. Will be my home for the next 2 months.
Australia is one of my home. My blog should start from here. Darwin is a strange place. It's one of most beautiful part of the world. The water is clear and the air is sticky and the fish is big and tasty. This is what world should be like less human and more parks and trees. I always thought about people in Darwin. Be aware people who live here aren't normal. High percentage of crazy people. (Maybe I belong here with the crazies). Eg: Traver the rubbish warrior who collect rubbish and make 'art' on the grass next to the footpaths. One day I was happy to watching him in action. The love and energy he puts into his 'art' is second to none.

Northern Territory belongs to a lost race. Everyone (including themselves) calls them black fellas. They are aboriginal. They are another group of native who is close to the spirt of land and elements. They are the rightful owner of the land. They are the carer of the land. Or at least use to be.
Over the black fella radio 94.5 I heard this song. It goes: before the white fellas came, we will happy, there were no wine, we hunt and we live. Before the white fellas came, there ware no beer....
The whites took their land. Expect them go to work and live in a material world with house and car. Teach them drinking and shop in supermarket. Taking land and cultural away from them, expected them to live in our modern society? How could they be not lost. The are homeless from home, just like animals in a cut down forest. This is no longer their dream time...

In the beginning....

A journey is personal. It changes one in a way unexpectedly. For some life is never the same after. I and my soul was lucky enough to be touched. Now nothing is the same. It's like being reborn.

About me:
I am 33 female, who spent 16 years in China and 16 years in Australia. I am the type don't really care what people think of me, like to live my life my way. Maybe that's why I am still not married and have no kids. Last year 2013 I decided to travel around and look for answer to a non existing question. I didn't know what I was looking for, but somehow find it by luck.

After return to Australia, I sold my car and house. Packed up my belonging. Ready to complete second part of my journey. What am I looking for? Well I am not 100% sure. Would I find what I am looking for? Hopefully. Where my next 16 will be? I don't know.